Have I done the right thing?

Its a sure sign that I am worried that my first action is make an entry in THIS blog . My normal blog is about weight loss, and life changes and quite philosophical at times. I started the demetia blog to try and keep that issue seperate. i try to keep Edna and her issues out of 'Changing life and times ' Normally my first move in the morning is to blog there about the previous day. Today I know I couldn;t do that because I need to talk about Edna as my main priority.

Yesterday I spoke to Moseley Hall about the missed appointment. It turns out Thursdays apppointment was the first of a series of twice weekly appointments to hep her with her breathing. Edna had clearly misunderstood becasue she told me they were every 2 weeks - and didnt know what they were for. I am sure she had been told but had either forgotten or not understood. I explianed she had forgotten the appointent due dementia, apologised and said what do we do know. ' Oh we've discharged her. It was the second appopintment she had missed' I realised they were including the March appointment when she had been in Selly Oak. I explained that she had been in hospital at that time, and I also explained that I could remind her of appointments to ensure she turned up. The freceptionist then went to talk to the person in charge of the classes and after a LONG time (I dread to think what that cst on my mobile) the receptionist came back and it was clear they were reluctant to take her on again, having pigeonholed her as a 'problem' thay they ddnt want to cope with. 'So I got a ot of waffle about whether she would benefit from the class , waffle about transport costs and it ended with the words. ' ts uo to you whether you think she would benefit' My immediate response was ' No actually it is up to YOU to decide if you wnat to help her or not' So Edna is back on the course starting on Monday.

I have to tell her this today when I go over with the shopping. I have decided to volunteer to go with her on Monday if she wants me to. I've already warned work I may have to take to her hospital (Boy am I glad I am a locum and dont have to grovel and apply for time off!) I am not sure how she will react. I may well be ringing them on Monday to cancel her from the course! She is going to be upset that she misunderstood the letters and infoirmation they gave her. She is also liley to say she doesnt want to bother 'becasuie her breathing wont get any better anyway' Well no it wont if she refuses all the help - just like painillers cant help if they stay inthe packet. God she is so stubborn sometimes .

I am alson worried about what other important information she may not have picked up from her post and I really feel I need to take charge of ALL her aperwork but cannot see a way to manage that. She is so determined to save me trouble - and doesnt realise she is causing me trouble by trying to save me work.

I got so mad at the Mosley Hall people . With the one mention of the word 'dementia' they didnt want to know about her any more. I appreciate that they couldnt know that I am health professional and wouldnt be trying to send her to them if I didnt think she would cope and benefit. I think if I can persuade her to go she WILL benefit becasue she has doen breathign excercises in the past and is quite proud of the fact that she still does them. But it was so clear that one word meant she was classified as a 'problem'

You would think an elderly care hospital (which Mosely hall is) would know that 'dementia comes in a variety of types and that not all sufferers are gibberring drooling wrecks who can't hold a rational conversation. I was SO angry about that

The conundrum is how do I ensure she gets treated as a proper person and not get hidden under an umbrella ;abelled 'Demntia' when I am feeling I cant let her do something as fundamental as dealing with her own post.

I am dreading this visit. I intend to meditate before I go so I am in as calm a frame of mind as possible. The meditation may also give some insights in to how to handle the communication with Edna - but I have to go in about an hour so I need to start getting ready.