Laundry

A longer visit today. She seemed to be in a lot of pain - there was certainly a lot of ouching and grimacing. But it somehow didn't ring true. Both the warden have in the past expressed the view that she often put on problems as a bit if attention seeking. I have a sneaky feeling the pain today was a bit like that. Certainly the nurses paid no attention to her obvious moans and groans.

Also somehow she had managed to lose not just one but BOTH of her ID bands. I don;t have a clue how she could have done it - but the nurses wouldn't take them off. She was given an alarm pendant when she was discharged lat month. The wardnes told me it ended up in 3 pieces after she took it apart. She would appear to have a compulsion to fiddle with things.....whihc is potentially very dangerous.


Today I was regaled with the tale of her night lut with Doris Pilkington lat night. She hasn't spoken to Doris for years after they fell out when Edna felt she was being sponged on. Edna actually believed Doris had died. Doris has been a persistent feature in her tales - even more so than Alan. I am wondering if she fantasises about her because she has some unfinished business. She said today that she was glad she and Dorid were talking again - even though they hadn't discussed what happened, I wonder if subconciously she wants to apologise to Doris. I do find it interestong that the one person she has NEVER mentioned seeing is Doug (her husband) and David (her elder son) . Either their deaths are ingrained into memory - or she has no unfinished business with them.

Today I had another bag of luamdry left by the nurses. At the moment I have some of her stuff drying, some in the washer, and now some more to go in with my next load. Its such a small thing to find annoying but I do. I am wondering if I should take more clothes in so I can do ALL her laundry in one load . I need to get on top of the luandry issue so I feel incontrol of it -not it in control of me. Its the one thing I haven't yet worked out how to manage.

She wasn't agrressive today - but I still felt I was visitng Mrs Hyde - which I preusme emans the Alzheimers was on top. There was an element of deliberate manipulation and a slyness about her attitude that I found unsettling. Almst as if she was humouring me by NOT disagreeing with me - but would be telling everyone what she really thought when I was gone.

I suppose I hmour her by entering her world when I don't try to get her to realise that Alan is dead, or that the woman down the ward isn't really Doris Pilkington. I wonder is she realises on one level that I am doing that?

One thing she said whihc I do need to find out if it fantasy or not is that she has been weighed (probably correct) and that she has lost another stone (unlikely to be true - although I can beleive she has lost more weight). I hope they have weighed her. Her BMI is almost certainly arounf 18 or 19 - possibly even lower. But she is an high protein diet and having fortisips so they are trying to stem the tied.

I really need to talk to the nurses - but it is so difficult to do it while I am on the ward since it is likely to bring out her paranoia and turn her into Mrs Hyde. I still don't know how she is going to react to the fact that the consultant wants to see me tomorrow. The fact that it is the consultant who has requested the meeting should make it all OK - but I wouldn't bet on it.